Memorial Day

Memorial Day has always been a pretty cool day in my book.

In the first part, I get to celebrate the men and women in my life (and that's a lot) who have served our country, and given me a place where I can live and be and write nonsense on the internet and be happy. Thank you soldiers and families!!!

In the second part, on May 25, 1998, Memorial Day, a pretty memorable thing happened. My daugher, the Bug, was born.

12 years old, and I can't believe the young woman she has become.

I love her so much!

Blog TItle

There's NoWhere Else on Earth I'd Rather Be...

Truer words were never spoken by me

except when speaking of my husband, children and home.

And yet, I work 40 hours a week at a job that takes me away from my home.

I like it.

I'm good at it.

I make a decent living.

I dislike not being at home, but it was a good fit for my family.

FOR AWHILE...

Mom and I, once again, attended BYU Womens Conference in Provo Utah.



I was an emotional wreck almost the whole time.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE Women's Conference.

I love my mom.

I dislike being told something I already know, and don't know how to get away from.

Most of the conference talked about being righteous mothers and wives.

Expected... I knew it was coming.

To have the General Relief Society Presdient say, very publicly, that the "swing shift" is the most important shift of the day, when speaking in terms of "mom's hours." I lost it completely... 16,000 women in the Marriott Center and I am feeling this horrific sense of guilt.

Basically, it comes down to the hours between school ending and bedtime are

the most important hours a mother has for raising her children.

Those are the exact hours that I am at the job for which I am most financially compensated.

My family requires the income, especially since My Hero is back at school.

And yet, I KNOW that I am not supposed to be doing this anymore. I have been rationalizing for too long, and something has to change.



SO...

I am revisiting Substitute Teaching.

I am renewing my teaching license in June, then submitting applications to surrounding school districts.

I am shopping for private health insurance.

I am working TONS to save up for the first two months of Substitute Teaching. I want to have enough set aside to cover bills in case I don't get called to teach, even though I will probably stay at my present job for at least a month after school starts, to make sure we have enough.



I was reading today in the Book of Mormon where Nephi says "I will go and do the things which the Lord has commanded, for I know the Lord giveth no commandments unto the children of men save he shall prepare a way that they may accomplish the things which he hath commanded them."

I have not been this peaceful in a really long time. I know that I am taking the right steps. I just wish that I could see what is next.

My cousin, Heath, said the strangest thing this weekend.

He said, if you ever want to hear true laughter, tell God your plans.

I realized, after thinking about it, that I spend a lot of time telling God my plans, instead of listening to the plans He has for me.

I'm sure His plans will take me to a place where "There is no place on earth I would rather be!"

Dear Mrs. C

Dear Mrs. C,

You probably don't remember me, but I remember you.

22 years after learning from you, I look at my daughter, almost 12 years old, and just completing sixth grade, and I remember you. I remember that my teacher in 6th grade truly cared about me as a person. Having taught sixth graders, I know it is difficult to deal with the hormones, etc., and you had 30 of us everyday.

Walking through the grocery store today, and spying Down the Long Hills on the book rack, I remember you. I learned to love Louis L'Amour in sixth grade, and to this day, some of the books I re-read are his. I bought the book, since I haven't read it since 6th grade, and plan on reading it to my daughters on a road trip over the weekend.

I attend Renaissance fairs, and I remember you. I remember dressing up in an costuming from the middle ages and asking people to kiss a frog, because that was my contribution to the fair. I remember going to Clinkerdaggers for dinner because I made the honor roll with 2 other girls. It was amazing! I still love all things mid-ages and renaissance (I even studied French throughout high school and college).

To this day, I cannot listen to Sorcerer's Apprentice without imagining black lights and gravestones, and I remember you. I learned so much about performance from your example. You were so good to not just support, but to encourage, our creative outlets.

My children and I take history walks throughout our town, and I remember you. The exercise, learning opportunities, and quality visiting time, are true highlights of my life, and I learned this trick from following you all around Fairbanks.

I attend Science Olympiad competitions for my daughter, and I remember you. I remember how you couldn't just have us open a textbook, read a chapter, outline, and answer the questions at the back. NoNO. We had to build something, or play with something, or live something.

I attended a stage production of The Phantom Tollbooth and I remember you. I remember scrambling through my locker trying to find something tangible to define tangible so I could come to class.

I currently work of the Gallup Poll, and I remember you. I remember passing out that crazy survey and then inputting the data to see the results. Now I do it everyday, and I love it!

I remember that I always wanted to be a teacher, but how I didn't realize what kind of teacher I wanted to be until I watched you. I learned that teaching is not something you do from textbooks. It is something that you give to the world from your heart.

For all these things I've learned, and for the better person I have become as a result of these lesson, I thank you for being my favorite teacher.

Know that you are remembered, that your work is noticed, and that you are appreciated.

With all the gratitude I can send,

Shannon H.

(Fort Wainwright Middle School 6th grade class of 1988-1989)

Today was a red-letter date.

(I am trying to be more positive in my life. I have to say 3 nice things before I can complain. This is gonna take awhile.)

1) I got to eat at VENUE for dinner. SO YUMMY!!!
2) I vacuumed my living room (this is an amazing feat and I'm glad that it happened!).
3) I found a fabulous bridal fair for Ivory Hill to participate in!

So, I had to make alternate plans for tomorrow night's girls' night because I may have to stay late at work. I am going to try to work around this snafu, but we will have to see.

1) If I do need to stay at work, I get off at 9pm, rather than the 11pm I usually work.
2) I got Ivory Hill booked at a venue in Wichita, Kansas, that offered him pay, a place to stay, and food. Pretty awesome, I think!!!
3) SoBe Lifewaters are very delicious. I especially like the fuji apple and pear flavor.

I forget that school is stressful. DJ has a test on Saturday I did not know about. He also has so many assignments that he can't keep up with them all. I feel badly for him because he is starting to get stressed out. He is no fun stressed.

1) Mom can watch Hailey and Katie on Saturday. I love that my family is so close.
2) I can get a lot of computer work done at Gallup because I have a new toy. It gives me more time at home to be home.
3) I got my new toy for free!!!

I have a confession to make. I lost my daughter's girl's camp form. This is what happens when I need to clean my house, car, purse...

1) I got to hang out with 8 of the most awesome 8-11 year old girls ever!!!!
2) I found both DVDs I needed for tomorrow within 2 minutes of looking.
3) MY BEST NEWS OF THE DAY: I got a workout this morning. I walked with my super-good friend (who patiently listens to my issues) and then went to work out with my trainer who decided that today would be the day to change up my routine. SHE MADE ME WORK. I hurt, I sweat, and I couldn't feel my arms for about an hour afterwards, but I feel so good today!!!

"Excercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy."

Shauna - You made my day!!!

The Stack

How tall is yours?

By stacks, I mean the pile of paperwork that must be gone through to run a household. Such a stack might include bills, children's school papers, advertisements, including catalogs, for things I do not need, but cannot live without, and receipts from my wallet (recently cleaned out) that I may or may not need come next taxing period.

It gets higher everytime I turn around.

I promise... these stacks are like bunnies.

Nonetheless, go through them, I must.

So here I sit, at work, sorting through the stack that took 2 bags to get here.

(For those of you who personally know me, you know that these are not cute little clutch bags. NONO.. I use the big, heavy, industrial sized canvas totes. These things should replace rucksacks for soldiers, except for the bright orange color and the gerber daisies embroidered on the side. That could pose a problem for camoflage...)

I digress...

At the bottom of the stack, I find the General Conference edition of the Ensign for May. It strikes me that the foundation of everything in my life is my Savior, Jesus Christ. with His help, I can do anything. He is the center of everything, and he understands all of the stress that my stack fires my way. At the end of the day, though, His words, through His prophets, sustain me. They shoulder the yoke of my burden, and they help me along.

I opened the pages of the magazine, and was drawn to an address given by President Thomas S. Monson called Preperation Brings Blessings. The title alone gave me the peace and comfort I needed after going through my stack. I realized that I am truly blessed.

Thanks to my Heavenly Father!

Concert Etiquette for Kids and the Parents who Love them!

"Shannon's guide to Taking Children to Performances."

These are not official rules, just MY OPINIONS, but may help parents, children, performers and theatre staff have a more pleasant experience.

1. Know your children. – Each child is different. Ages, temperaments, attitudes, bladders and sleeping patterns can affect a theatre-going experience. In this day and age, I would recommend "practice sessions" with video recordings in your own home, followed by "dress rehearsals" at movie theatres with kid-friendly movies. The following behaviors are appropriate for a concert hall. Ironically, some adults still struggle with these behaviors:
   
   1. Quietly sit still 1-2 hours while watching performance, with no food or drink.
      
   2. Use a whisper voice only when performance is not active (i.e. breaks between songs, act changes, etc.)
      
   3. Hold bladder 1-2 hours (It is not okay to put a child in a diaper or pull up, have the child poop, but wait 45 minutes until intermission or conclusion to change. That behavior really stinks.)
      
   4. Use a public bathroom facility.
      
   5. Dress appropriately for the event.
      
   6. Turn off electronic equipment, including cell phones, cameras, video games, etc.
      
   7. NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY! It distracts the performers, and wreaks havoc on the thousands of dollars they have spent on their lighting design.
      
2. Know the venue. – Before you take your children to an event at the venue of choice, attend an event yourself.
   
   1. Take a stop watch. – Time how long it takes you to get from turning the car on to when you sit down in your seat in the theatre. Plan to park in about the same place. Also, time how long it takes you from the point you stand up after the performance until you walk in your door.
      
   2. Find the seats you will be sitting in with your children.
      
   3. Locate the nearest exits, bathrooms, etc. If you "know the drill" it goes more smoothly when your children are with you.
      
   4. Whenever possible, take your children on a "practice run". Most family-friendly venues, when asked nicely, will allow you to come in during lobby hours and go into the theatre to show your children what to expect. A quick walk-through only takes about 15 minutes, but saves a lot of stress the night of when you add thousands of strangers, lighting and noise changes, and an awkward time of day (most performances take place very close to bedtime).
      
3. Know the performance. – Do your homework!
   
   1. Read the description of the event presented by the ticket office.
      
   2. Look up the event online. Read the descriptions. If you feel uncertain about the event DON'T BUY THE TICKET. It's better to be safe than sorry.
      
   3. Show your children the pictures, and read them the website information.
      
4. The day of the performance:
   
   1. Call the theatre and ask for the run-time of the show. If the show and drive time are going to keep your children up more than an hour after their normal bedtime, consider short naps earlier in the day.
      
   2. Prepare outfits early, and have them ready for changing pre-departure, post-eating. Remember that many theatres are kept chilly because the bright stage lights produce heat, and cause theatres to warm up. Light layers are best.
      
   3. Pack your bag. Include diapers and wipes (if your children use them) and a small penlight. Remember that theatres do not like food brought in, even if it is "just a water bottle and some cheerios." NO FOOD! If you are looking at a drive-home time of greater than 20 minutes, consider taking pajamas along to change into after the show. These can be left in the car, and greatly help when children fall asleep in the car.
      
   4. Take the length of time it took you to get to the theatre (from 2a above), add 15 minutes, and plan to leave that many minutes before the show starts.
      
   5. DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE THE LUXURY OF VALET SERVICE. That $20+ tip may be worth it after the show when you are carrying sleeping, or cranky, children out to the car.
      
   6. USE THE BATHROOM WHEN YOU GET TO THE THEATRE! Even if the children went right before you left the house, atmospheric differences affect bladder control.
      
   7. Have a great time!

Shameless....

Warning: I am about to set myself apart as a SHAMELSS big sister, so proud of her little brother that I can't even describe!!!

Aaron, the youngest of the three, has finally decided that he is making his break for professional musical artist.

If you haven't had the pleasure of listening to his fantastic-ness... you really should. The easy-listening acoustic sound has broad appeal, and, in my humble opinion, really draws on who he is.

That being said, take a listen for yourself at his MySpace page. If you like what you see, don't hesitate to add yourself to his fan list on his Facebook page and share with whomever you think would appreciate his style!

Sunshine

But friendship is precious,
not only in the shade,
but in the sunshine of life,
and thanks to a benevolent arrangement the greater part of life is sunshine.
Thomas Jefferson

I always loved it when Christian bookstores, etc would change the "u" into an "o" in the word sunshine. It completely changed my perspective on everything.

I love sunshine.
I love the brightness.
I love the change from day to night.
I love the rising and the setting, the colors and the moods.

I love all of it,
but I am most grateful for my Savior and for the light that he gives.

"There is Sunshine in my soul today
More glorious and bright
Than glows in any earthly sky,
For Jesus is my Light.

There is music in my soul today,
A carol to my king,
And Jesus listening can hear
The songs I can not sing.

There is gladness in my soul today,
And hope and praise and love,
For blessings which he gives me now,
For joys 'laid up' above

Oh, there's sunshine, blessed sunshine
When the peaceful happy moments roll.
When Jesus shows his smiling face,
There is sunshine in my soul!"

CONTROL

“As your faith is strengthened you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will, and that you will flow with them, to your great delight and benefit.” Emmanuel Teney

I'm a control freak. I come by it naturally, but this week, it has become increasingly important to me that I let God take control, and trust that it will be okay.

It will be!

Faith

“When you have come to the edge
Of all light that you know
And are about to drop off into the darkness
Of the unknown,
Faith is knowing
One of two things will happen:
There will be something solid to stand on or
You will be taught to fly”

Either way... I know my Heavenly Father is there for me, and for those I love.

When the Lord closes a door...

Shortly after I met Hero, he began working for Burger King, first as an assistant manager, and now as a restaurant manager. His big goal is to be an accountant, but that requires him finishing school, and let's be honest, who has time for that???

Last Thursday, Hero had some allergy testing done, simply because his symptoms have become almost too much for him to bear, and, as he calls it, he has a lot of "outside motivation" (btw- that means me).

Among a myriad of other things, Hero is allergic to corn and mold.

We are going to skip over the obvious jokes about being allergic to the state of Nebraska, and go right to the fact that he is allergic to his job.

If you think of a standard double cheeseburger at Burger King, the only thing Hero will not respond allergically to is the beef. And we are not talking food allergies here, we are talking about airborne allergies associated with food. He can't get away from this.

There are things we are doing to limit his allergies. The first was to buy a hefty air purifier for the house, and a baby one for his office at work. We are redoing our bedding, and covering all upholstery in the bedroom to limit contaminants. Hero deep-cleaned everything. We are gradually fixing things up to make it cleaner and less cluttered in our home. We are changing our diet to accommodate the needs of his. He starts immuno-therapy in two weeks: 4 shots every Wednesday.

It isn't enough. We have been talking for years about him going back to school, and I finally just laid it out there. I need him alive in 50 years. That means he needs to get out of the restaurant. He balked a little, but he understood. He thought about it for awhile, and decided that we did need to have him go back.

Sunday night, he shared with me that there may be an opening in his company for an accounting graduate in about 5 years, about when he would get done with school.

We filled out the online applications for Southeast Community College and FAFSA yesterday.

He starts on March 31st. 3 classes a quarter.

And the Lord opened a window!!!

Soundtrack of Life!!!

I am a music junkie... My husband knows it, I know it, and my children are becoming junkies too. I can go from opera to reggae to hip hop to country in seconds, and I have a pretty eclectic collection to prove it. It is only worse, because my brother, Bubby, is a junkie too, and I have his old computer and his old ITunes stuff.

My friend, V, put a little list together, and I did one too!

Enjoy!!!
(By the way, I loved it so much, I burned the CD for my car!!!)

Opening Credits:
"Get Back" The Beatles

Waking Up:
"So Far, So Good" Bryan Adams (I would hope so!!!)

Falling In Love:
"Don't Stop Believin'" Journey (Admit it.. you're singing!!!)

Fight Song:
"A Kind of Magic" Queen (Really???)

Breaking Up:

"Rock You Like a Hurricane" Scorpians (YES!!!!)

Make-up:

"Can't Buy Me Love" Beatles (I can't make this stuff up!!!)

Life’s Okay:
"Sing" The Carpenters (I do sing when life is good, or bad, or fine...)

Mental Breakdown:
"Can't Stop This Thing We Started" Bryan Adams (LOL!!!!!)

Driving:
"I've Got You Under My Skin" Michael Buble

Flashback:
"Harden My Heart/Shadows of the Night" from Rock of Ages Soundtrack

Happy Dance:
"Love Shack" B-52's (some part of your body just started dancing...)

Regretting:
"Forgot About Dre" Dr. Dre (LOL!!!!)

Final Battle:
"Rocket Man" Elton John

Death Scene:
"Every Breath You take" The Police (Can you say irony, and a little creepy...)

Make-Out Scene:
"Corazon Espinado" Santana featuring Mana (latin... really???)

Ending Credits:
"True Colors" Phil Collins

Christmas in Saint George

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Windows

Windows sales people have taken up residence in my front yard.

They have been out there for about 45 minutes, just talking in my driveway.

I was supposed to leave for work, but I don't want to leave the girls alone with weirdos in the street.

(BTW, they did approach the door.

I informed them that we are renting the property and they left...

still in the driveway, but they left the doorstep.)

Is it a sad commentary on my life when this is the most interesting thing that is happening this afternoon???

Not to mention incredibly ironic that I am watching them through my large picture window in my living room???

Perhaps I've gone a bit too far...

I always knew this day would come...

I would look around the Sunday evening dinner table and see myself as through my mother's eyes... only, the 11 year old me would be my daughter.

Tonight... it happened.

Yesterday's discovery of the lies told to a teacher came back to haunt my dear little Hailey. After reporting a proper practicing schedule to her band teacher, we came to find that she was delinquent... a lot.

I found myself thinking a lot about repentance since I discovered the problem. I wanted to teach my daughter a principle of truth, and encourage her to change her behavior. I didn't want to be mad.

Repentance is one of the first principles of the gospel and is
essential to our temporal and eternal happiness.
It is much more than just acknowledging wrongdoings.
It is a change of mind and heart that gives us a fresh view about God, about ourselves, and about the world.
It includes turning away from sin and
turning to God for forgiveness.
It is motivated by love for God
and the sincere desire to obey His commandments.

Although it hardly seems fair, a certain amount of repentance needs to take place for Hailey to become a better person. There were steps that she needed to take.

1) Acknowledge the wrong - Hailey needed to identify that she had done something wrong. She needed to feel sorrow for her choice, and a desire to fix the situation. Her lack of practicing was an issue, but more important was her bearing false witness. She lied... We needed to fix that.

2) Apologize and Ask for Forgiveness - Once she realized that we needed to fix the problem, she had to go about telling the teacher she was sorry. I sent an e-mail to the teacher, informing her that we had found the discrepancy in the practice times. I also informed Hailey that it was her responsibility to say she was sorry to her teacher.

3) Right the wrong - Hailey will now be practicing every morning: Monday-Friday at 6:30am, Saturdays at 7:30am and Sundays at 9am, so that mom can supervise proper practicing procedure. This will take place until all claimed practice time is made up. We also explained to Hailey that her grade may be affected because of the information I sent to her teacher. There are always consequences.

4) Hailey will need to go to her Heavenly Father and ask for forgiveness as well. Unfortunately, this is not something I can help her with. No amount of discipline on my part can help her see her way through this process. The best I can hope for is that she understands how much her Heavenly Father loves her, and that he wants for her to be honest. He wants her to be happy, and to tell the truth. This can only be accomplished when she understands that she has made a mistake and learns from it, and

5) Never does it again. The most vital of the repentance process, we are to change our heart so we have no more desire to perform the wrong.

As a parent, it was very hard for me to go through this process with her tonight. I'm not looking forward to the daily french horn practicing, but, as her mother, I will sit by her and support her.

DJ told me not to use the mom-ism comment "This hurts me more than it hurts you." I never really believed it until tonight, but I didn't say it. I watched my daughter weep. She felt so bad. My heart yearned to forgive her all, but I knew that it was the better part to let her go through this, and to stand by her side.

In Mosiah 4:3 it says:

And it came to pass that after they had spoken these words
the Spirit of the Lord came upon them,
and they were filled with joy,
having received a remission of their sins,
and having peace of conscience,
because of the exceeding faith
which they had in Jesus Christ...

I am so grateful for the opportunity I have to repent of my wrong-doings, and I am so blessed that the Atonement of Jesus Christ is there for my children, and for me. I know that joy can truly come when we follow the Savior.

Middle of the night...

In my experience, the times we are needed the most are most likely the times that we are most inconvenienced. Fortunately, last night was not one of those times.

My friend texted me at work asking if I could help her with her car. Seems that the lock on the door (meaning that only one door of the 5 on the car accepts a regular key to open it) was broken and the key would not turn. Adding insult to injury, the fobs (the little mechanical doo-hickeys attached to the key ring that electronically open the doors) have stopped working, even with the batteries replaced. As this is their only car, this is quite a problem. Fortunately for her, I really have nothing better to do at 11PM, immediately following a work shift, so I drove over to help her out.

I picked her up at her home, and drove her to her car, parked on a side street, in front of her husband's boss' house. Sure enough, the car won't open. I ask her if she has roadside assistance.

Digression:
Unlocking your car door if you lock the keys inside = $50.
Getting a tow truck to move your car anywhere = minimum $80 (if you are lucky).
Paying $3 a month for roadside assistance to take care of this for you = PRICELESS!!!!!

Sure enough, her warranty with her automobile's manufacturer covered just such an emergency, so we called them. They told us it was going to be an hour before they could get a tow truck to the car.

My diabetes SCREAMED at me. I needed protein. So we drove a few blocks to D'Leon's. For those of you Lincolnites who have never had D'Leons... The 24 hour fast food mexican restraunts are wonderful. For just over $4 I received a LARGE chicken burrito, of which I could only eat half. The other half will be lunch today. (I'm so excited!). We drove back over to the boss' house to wait for the tow truck, and the boss came out and asked us to park in his driveway so we didn't look like we were casing the neighborhood. (Don't I just come off as the burglary type???) We are sitting in the driveway, and I open my burrito wrapper, and some of the burrito juice dumps onto my shirt. The consistancy, color, and texture greatly resembled what I'm sure the burrito would have looked like digested in reverse, and we laughed and laughed.

Thus is the story of my facebook status....

don`t mind me... I`m just sitting in your driveway in my car at midnight wiping what appears to be puke off my shirt.

Side note - The two truck arrived, and was able to open the car door, after picking the lock with one of those long metal things. It was quite the adventure!!!

Moral of the story: If you are locked out of your car in the middle of the night, I can probably be reached to give you a warm place to sit... Just don't let me open my D'Leon's burrito without covering myself in napkins.

Righteous Women... A Call to Arms

The onslaught of e-mails has increased. Blogs tirade regularly of dissatisfaction. People, if they can find something to complain about, will.

I say - "Thumper... what did you father

tell you just this morning?"

"If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

Nonetheless, sometimes we find ourselves in a position where we need to stop another from affecting us negatively, and still do it positively.

I found myself in just such this situation recently. A self-professed Latter-day Saint Christian woman with whom I am associated recently sent me a mass e-mail. She does this pretty regularly, and I, typically, ignore her emails, but this time it really got to me. The first paragraph, a comment on the article she forwarded, was scathing. Among other things, she referred to the President of the United States as evil, a racist, and that he is "filled with hate." She then included a forwarded e-mail claiming to be written by an American historian. She testified that the comments were along the same lines as she was thinking.

Allow me to interject briefly... This blog is not about politics. For those of you that know me, I'm not a fan of politics, and so I'm not writing about that. I am writing to illustrate methods of communication.

I don't trust a lot of what I read in mass mailings. When I check the facts (usually at snopes.com) I find that the email is a myth, and not worth my time. I reviewed the article she forwarded and found it to be a fallacy. At this point, I knew that perhaps this individual needed to be reminded of her worth. To refer to the President as she did, and then propagate the mis-information she received, without checking her facts, frightened me.

I was afraid for her, that she could hold so much hate.

How to proceed, and still follow the credo left by Thumper's father... hmmm... I responded to her e-mail. Please, dear reader, tell me what you think of my response. My goal was to be patient, understanding, but request a bit more respect when she sends things to me.

I received your mass e-mail today, and I would like to respectfully request that unless you have verified your facts, please do not forward me political articles. If if you have verified the facts, please attach the proof to the e-mail. That being said, to further give you some light and knowledge on the e-mail you forwarded to me, I went to a website called snopes.com. The purpose of this website is to factually prove or debunk internet "rumors." I suggest you take the time to read this link I am sending you, in the hopes that you will understand why I made this request.

In the Articles of Faith it says that "We believe in being subject to kings, PRESIDENTS, rulers and magistrates in obeying, honoring and sustaining the law." Whether or not you approve of President Obama is your choice, however, to force your opinions that he is evil upon me, unsolicited, is not welcome or okay. President Obama is still a child of God, and did, in the pre-mortal world make a decision to follow the Savior, just as you and I did. If you choose not to think of him as a child of God, just remember the promises and covenants you have made, and the commandments from the Savior to “Love thy neighbor as thyself” and then remember who Christ defined as our neighbors from the parable of the Good Samaritan.

That being said, and because, by sending this e-mail you solicited my response, please consider my opinion on President Obama. I do not believe that he is evil. I believe that he is governing the country to the best of HIS ability. My concern with Mr. Obama is that he is not going to the Lord for their instruction about what should happen in this country. That does not make him evil; it just makes him not relying on the arm of the Lord. The only way he is going to change his attitudes is if we, as an American public, go to him and force the changes through the APPROPRIATE POLITICAL PROCESSES. We write letters and e-mails to our leaders about specific issues and choices, not involving character. We can’t control how they behave; we can control how they vote IN OUR BEHALF.

Please understand that I do not mean any disrespect, and that is why I share these things with you. We need to respect our leaders, and check our facts, before we go accusing people of things of which they may or may not be guilty.

President Spencer W. Kimball gave a speech in 1979, that, in recent months, I have heard quoted on many occassions. I'd like to quote part of it now.

How special it is for Latter-day Saint women to be given the lofty assignments they have been given by our Father in Heaven, especially those of you who have been privileged to be born in this part of this last dispensation. Let other women pursue heedlessly … their selfish interests. You can be a much needed force for love and truth and righteousness on this planet. …

… My dear sisters, may I suggest to you something that has not been said before or at least in quite this way. Much of the major growth that is coming to the Church in the last days will come because

Many of the good women of the world

(in whom there is often such an inner sense of spirituality)

will be drawn to the Church in large numbers.

This will happen to the degree that

the women of the Church reflect

righteousness and articulateness in their lives

and to the degree that

the women of the Church are seen as

distinct and different—in happy ways—

from the women of the world.

… Thus it will be that female exemplars of the Church will be a significant force in both the numerical and the spiritual growth of the Church in the last days. …

We love you sisters. We have confidence in you. We rejoice in your devotion. We are greatly heartened by your presence … in this portion of this dispensation wherein your talents and spiritual strength are so desperately needed.. Ensign, Nov. 1979, 103–4

President Kimball stipulated that we need to be righteous, articulate, distinct and different in happy ways. We need to stand for the good there is in this world. That will separate us from the others, and they will be drawn to us because of the difference.

Sisters, my call today is for us to be more righteous, articulate, distinct, different and happy. When the time comes for us to say something... let it be nice... let it be positive... let it be uplifting, and let us be known as a sisterhood that looks for the best, and welcomes with open arms. If changes must be made, let us please look for the way to adjust without offense, relying on the example of the Savior. We are all chidlren of our Heavenly Father, and deserve that respect. Remember...

We can not like choices that are made,
but we can still love the person.

Jesus did... and so can we.

Reputation

I said, "Mom, what are you doing, you're ruining my rep"
She said, "You're only sixteen, you don't have a rep yet"
"If they were laughing you don't need them,
"Cause they're not good friends"

The Fresh Prince definitely had his own take on the power of reputation... I didn't realize my 11 year old would have to deal with it too.

Her 6th grade Health class participates in a program called All-stars, where they talk about several different choices that teenagers are now forced to make, and the steps leading to these choices, and what can be done to help make the best choice. One of the aspects I particularly love about this program is the parental involvement. Every so often, Hailey will bring home a worksheet with answers to scripted questions on one side, and a few questions she is to discuss with me on the other side. The questions that she discusses with me are based upon the answers given on the previous page.

This time, the paper was about reputation.

By definition, a reputation is the estimation in which a person or thing is held, esp. by the community or the public generally. According to my daughter, this means that a reputation is what other people think of you.

So I ask, can you affect what other people think of you.
She says, yes, by the choices you make.
Okay, so what kinds of choices should you make. Right ones...

So far, so good.

Okay, so now I am going to tell you a story. There was this guy. He had some people that HATED him. It was really bad. They thought that he broke rules. He made other people question their belief. They thought he wasn't obedient to his leaders.
Then there was this other group of people who thought he wasn't very important, but because of the choices he made, other people got mad, and there was arguing and fighting and violence, and this second group didn't like that, so they did bad things to him.
Then there was this third group of people who thought that he was super important. They would sit and listen to him for hours. They saw the good that he did and would tell their friends.
Hailey, who is this man? Mom.... that's Jesus.
That's right. Did Jesus care what people thought of Him? Nope.
Who's opinion did Jesus care about? Heavenly Father's.
That's right. Did Jesus make bad decisions? No.
That's right. Not once. Did everyone think he was a good person? No.
So, is your reputation the most important thing to worry about? No.
So what should you think about? I should try to make the right decisions, and not worry about what other people think of me.
That's right. What can you do to help you remember to make the right decisions? I can remember that I am a child of God and that He loves me. If I remember that, then I don't need to worry about whether or not people like me or not.
That's right. You can't control what other people think, but as long as you are doing what's right, that's all that matters. You know your Heavenly Father loves you, and you know I love you, and you know that is not going to change. The friends that you have, that are good friends, are not going to give you a bad reputation if you are making good choices. You won't always be perfect, but at least you are doing the best you can, and fixing things when you need to. That's all that we ask.

Now the clincher...

Mom... I can't write that on my paper. This is for school. I will get into trouble.

Friends, I'm not gonna lie. That simple statement broke my heart. To think that the most important thing I can teach my daughter about who she is and how she is special, and the best defense I can give her against the forces of darkness in this world, will get her into trouble at school is such a sad little commentary on the world today. I told her to write it anyway. (I'm a rebel...) Then I took her paper and wrote a note to her teacher, right under my signature.

"Dear Mr. N,
Our family stands very firm in our religious faith. We use the lessons we learn from our faith to teach our children correct principles. The answers Hailey has written reflect the discussion we had, and the principles taught within our faith, and within our family. If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to contact me."

The best thing that we can do for our families, and for the world today, is to continue being the best men and women we can be. I believe that by following the principles of the gospel, and remembering our own divinity, we can change the world... even if it is one growing-up girl at a time.

PS... When I checked my reader this morning, there was my daily nugget of religious wisdom, that totally applied to this post...

“Let us . . . honor the special place of the family. As James Q. Wilson wrote:“ ‘We learn to cope with the people of this world because we learn to cope with the members of our family. Those who flee the family flee the world; bereft of the [family’s] affection, tutelage, and challenges, they are unprepared for the [world’s] tests, judgments, and demands’ (The Moral Sense [1993], 163).”

Neal A. Maxwel, “The Tugs and Pulls of the World,” Liahona, Jan. 2001, 44

September Visiting Teaching

I love visiting teaching. There are few greater things that I enjoy more. The biggest reason that I do love visiting teaching, is because it helps me connect with Sisters.

I never had sisters of my own. I ended up with brothers, so when they got married, I was thrilled because there were finally girls!!!

September's Visiting Teaching message from the Ensign talked about Understanding and living the Gospel of Christ. You may wonder what this has to do with Visiting Teaching and sisterhood... I don't. It means the world to me. It means eternity to me.

How Does Understanding and Living the Gospel Bless Lives?

Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles: “We must live the gospel in such a way that we will have the Spirit to ever be with us. If we live worthily, the Spirit will always be with us. We can then teach by the Spirit. … The reason we pray, study the scriptures, have good friends, and live the gospel through obedience to the commandments is so that when—not if, but when—the trials come, we are ready” (“Teaching by Faith,” Liahona, Sept. 2003, 10, 14–15; Ensign, Sept. 2003, 20, 24–25).

I absolutely love that Elder Hales listed "Have good friends" in the same list as prayer, scripture study and obedience to the commandments. I think there are few things that are more important to us than the friendships that we have, whether they are based upon our relationships with our family, or without, it is these relationships that have been promised us in the hereafter.

Even as I sit and type, "Angels Among Us" by Alabama is playing. I cannot thank the many women who I am grateful to call friends. They are truly angels to me, and they know who they are.

Thank you, my sisters, for your love, your support and your ongoing friendship. When my trials come, you are ready... I love you!